If you’re a guy that is less than six feet tall, chances are that you’ve run into some issues when it comes to dating regarding your height. In fact, 49% of women use height as a filter when it comes to their online dating searches. So, how is this short guy supposed to survive in this dating world? You’ve got to be a little tricky, and I’m going to tell you how.
If you’re a short guy who’s zoned in on only watching black pill YouTube channels, you’re going to be misled into believing that only tall people are dating all the women out there, and it’s simply not true.
In the U.S., only 14.5% of guys are six feet or taller, which means 85% of guys actually fall under that six-foot threshold, with about five-nine being the general average.
It’s important to remember that your height is not directly correlated with you actually dating. In fact, the majority of women out there are going to date guys under six feet, simply because there aren’t that many guys over six feet for them to choose from.
And that sounds great if you’re part of the 85% that’s under six feet tall, but we do run into a bit of a social problem. You see, women tend to prefer men that are six feet or taller. They mention it in surveys; they filter guys out on dating websites by it. How are you supposed to compete in that market when it’s driven into us socially that men who are six feet tall are more worthy of dating?
The point I’m about to share is a bit controversial. In fact, I’m kind of torn as to where I even stand on this, but I want to share it anyway.
You should probably lie about your height.
Hear me out, though, before you agree or disagree in the comments down below. The reason why you should lie about your height is simply to give you a better advantage when that’s the criteria that people are going to judge you on, something that really has nothing to do with the core of who you are.
But isn’t that a bit deceptive? I mean, you’re starting this potential relationship out with someone foundationally on a lie. And how can you actually build any level of truth when you know that you’ve told them something totally made up from the very beginning?
I understand and can definitely see the merits of that argument. However, I also understand a different perspective from guys who are actually short. Their position rests more like this: let’s say you’re on a first date with someone, and you’re really, really nervous. Well, you don’t want to tell that person outright that you’re nervous, so you’re gonna fake a little bit of that confidence so that you can appear a little bit more cool, calm, and collected.
Are you lying to them if you rehearse a few different conversation topics and answers beforehand and then work them into the conversation as if you just naturally thought of them on the spot? Probably.
Are you lying to them if they flat out ask you, “Are you nervous right now?” and you tell them no, absolutely not, when deep down, you know what’s really going on? Yeah, probably.
But the way I see it, you are still in the process of getting through those introductory conversations, the ones where you’re still a bit nervous and on your best behavior around that person because you don’t know them well enough yet. You don’t feel like you’re in a place where you can be your open and honest self.
So, if you’re a guy that’s 5’6 and you’re constantly being met with rejection simply because of your height, adding a few inches is going to allow you to potentially take that thought off of your mind.
You can focus on actually connecting with a person over real non-superficial things. Now, of course, there are some obvious drawbacks to lying about your height.
Number one, guys are already doing it on dating apps so girls are kind of suspicious when a guy says that he’s six foot or six one. They tend to know that he’s probably five-eight or five nine or you might say they’re a certain height and when you meet that girl in person, she just instantly knows that you made that up and that can just totally deteriorate the potential relationship right then and there.
I did say this is a bit of a controversial take, so what I would recommend doing is if you’re a guy under six feet and you’re worried about not getting dates, you might want to build your hobbies and your interests around what women consider to be a dreamy persona.
These are different personas that display a level of power, mystique, or creativity, and those are the ones that women just tend to be more drawn to. That might mean looking more into being an artist, a writer, a musician, a comedian, an athlete, an organizer, something that allows you to put yourself in a position where people want to be around you, people are interested in you, and what you’re doing because you are an entertainer above all.
In that scenario, you may be creating something that’s way more gravitational and thereby successful for you in dating. If you’re someone that’s not super tall but you could just use that as a checklist item to get girls.
I know it sounds cliche, it might come off a little bit like just be yourself type in advice. What you’re actually doing here is strategic, you’re aligning yourself with different roles and personas that women are drawn to.
Take a look at different musicians, for example, there are so many musicians that are popular not because they’re attractive but because they’re talented and the talent is what draws people to them and that might be your active advantage if you’re someone that’s under six feet.
But I will say this though, the best thing that you can do to potentially secure a dating partner is to not allow the struggles and hardships that you’re facing currently in dating to allow you to become jaded towards the process. This happens to far too many guys when they’re constantly dealing with rejection, especially when it’s over something that they have no control over like their height.
The easiest thing that we can do is to point a finger at someone and get upset with them because they don’t have to go through the same challenges that we do in order to succeed. For them, it might come more naturally and that can make you frustrated because why were you given this hard path in life? Why were you chosen to suffer and not them?
The problem with going down that path is that rejection starts to hurt a lot more and failure starts to sting a lot more, and all it does is distance you more and more from potentially meeting someone because you’re always going to second-guess them. You’re always going to allow insecurity to drive your thought process. You’re not going to allow yourself to rest in peace when you’re with someone who doesn’t value height as everyone else does.
Overall, your dating life might suck a lot less if you learn to manage the expectations you have in dating. That might mean recognizing your own limitations and capabilities within social standards and adjusting for that. Recognizing that maybe you’re not going to get the beautiful top 10 models and you might be better off with someone that’s more on your wavelength.
People don’t like to hear that because what they actually hear is you’re telling me to settle for someone that I don’t really like, and nothing could be further from the truth. All I’m suggesting is to recognize where you might have shortcomings, where you might have successes, what your strengths and your weaknesses are, and to kind of really looking for someone that can match that better, rather than this big hopeful expectation you might think you want but might not actually make you happy in the end.
But I’m sure I said something you either agree with or disagree with, so I need to hear your opinion on it. Should you lie about your height? Is it totally unethical or is it just a necessity to survive in the dating market today?
On that note, I’ll catch you next time.
As always, love and peace.