Imagine you’re walking down the hallway in your school when you spot your crush. You’re taken aback by how beautiful she is. You just want to walk up to her, start talking, and ask her out but your nerves are getting the best of you.
What if I were to tell you the best thing you can do at that moment is to follow the three-second rule? Don’t know what it is? Let me break it down so that you can do it the next time you see her.
The three-second rule is basically this, whenever you see a girl that you want to talk to give yourself no more than three seconds to start approaching her.
A lot can happen in those three seconds and you don’t want your mind to start wandering into all the possibilities as to why things can go wrong.
Literally, it’s as simple as saying there she is, I want to talk to her, one, two, three, go! Start moving your feet and start heading in her direction because if you pause, if you hesitate, everything is going to go wrong.
Trust me, you’re gonna start to overthink and wonder is this the right time to be approaching her? Do I have something to talk to her about? How do I go about this without being awkward and weird? If you think things are going to be awkward and weird, chances are they’re gonna be awkward and weird.
But something crucial to keep in mind is that this interaction right now is not about creating this huge romantic spark, it’s simply about getting yourself on the map. Being acknowledged by her, having her know who you are, and being able to say yeah, I finally talked to her. I finally broke that barrier that’s been holding me back.
If you’ve never really interacted with her before then all you have is this fantasy image of what she’s like in your mind. This is going to ground you into reality because there is a threshold in the middle. Where you were before is having never talked to her and where you’re going to be now is someone that she actually knows.
It’s as plain as day. Following the three-second rule is going to teach you one valuable life lesson:
It is no longer impossible to approach any girl that you want to.
Now, you’re probably thinking, what do I talk to her about? How do I make that situation actually work? And it’s actually a lot simpler than you think.
First off, I want you to totally abandon the idea that you need to have a long detailed interactive conversation with her. This is your first interaction. It’s okay to keep it short and brief. In fact, it’s preferable.
You want to leave a little bit of space for mystery and curiosity on her part. You want her to know who you are but not every detail about you just yet. So, you spot the girl you like, you’re psyching yourself up and you’re counting down from three. Three, two, one, go.
Now you’re walking over towards her and your mind doesn’t have time to come up with excuses as to why you shouldn’t do it. Now that you’re standing face-to-face with her you could simply say something like this.
“Hey my name is (blank), I spotted you around here before but I don’t think we’ve ever talked or interacted so I just wanted to introduce myself.”
It’s simple, easy, and confident. Boom. That’s exactly what you want here. The perfect way to start that conversation.
What you follow up with is just as important. You want to ask her a simple question to get her opinion on something, just something small so you can learn a little bit more about her.
“You look like someone who has really good taste in TV shows and I just finished watching (insert show here), what would you recommend I watch next?”.
This is a good line to go to because it’s simple. Most people watch TV shows or have some recommendations to give and they can share what they actually like where you’re going to learn that little more about them.
Offer a compliment and then tell her that you’re excited to talk to her again in the future. It could be as simple as:
“Hey, I’m really happy I asked for your opinion. You seem to have really good taste. Next time I see you I’m going to stop by and say hi.”
Now you’ve set the grounding for that reality you’re no longer living in the fantasy world. You have a real connection with her and all it took was not letting nervousness and overthinking get in the way.
This is honestly where most people struggle. They want to plan out every single move perfectly so that they never end up actually doing anything at all. All you’re going to take is three seconds and that’s three seconds to get from where you are to where she is so you can say hi.
I believe in you. I know you can do it.
On that note, I’ll catch you next time.
As always, love and peace.